Ah! To Be Understood.

Some time ago I made reference to something Zen Master Ryokan wrote about in connection with personal habits of speaking to be aware of. One of them was talking with ones hands My mother did it, she did it a lot! It was almost as if she helped herself to find a word or an expression by wiggling her fingers. And sometimes her hands as well. It wasn’t the kind of use of hands where one adds emphasis such as making a fist to show anger. Or add strength to a welcome with a gesture. We have the saying Welcome with open arms don’t we. There is the custom when ushering in a guest with an open hand and then pointing through into the house or room, arm extended. In this instance words can be cut out all together.

Somebody wrote asking me about this business of talking with ones hands questioning what Ryokan wrote. Personally I don’t think he was talking about adding emphasis, colour, humour, emotion and the like to interactions. More the kind of habitual wiggling my mother did and which I did until the habit was pointed out to me. I think I still use my hands and arms while talking, and hopefully only when needed and I REALLY hope I have kicked the habit of searching for words with my hands.

And as I write this an image comes to mind from a few days ago. I was waiting at the traffic lights and a man with two energetic dogs was waiting to be let into a house. He gave them a dog training gesture, hand flat and horizontal then moved the hand as if to point to their tails. Obedience itself! Calmly they sat, calmly they sat as the door was opened. Calmly they walked in. No mad dash as is quite often the case.

Now another story comes to mind. Of a gran with here grandchild at play school where the pre verbal children are taught to communicate by using their hands to sign what they want, don’t want etc. See Sing and Sign.

Ah communication! Ah language! So full of colour and so ripe for misunderstanding.

Why Shout?

A Buddha asked his disciples, ‘Why do we shout in anger?
Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?’

Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, ‘Because we lose our calm, we shout for that.’

‘But, why to shout when the other person is just next to you?’ asked the Buddha.
‘Isn’t it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice?
Why do you shout at a person when you’re angry?’

The answer can be found here on Beyond The Opposites blog.

Thank you for the link to long time sangha friend Norman in California.

The Merit Of Forgetting

I was reminded last night of my very first entry in Jade Mountains (then Moving Mountains). The title is The Green Mountains Are Forever Walking.

Those resolutions on the turn of the new year are often forgotten quickly and maybe that’s a good thing really. Perhaps they have been lost sight of because their purpose has been fulfilled. Or perhaps those good intentions were seen as unrealistic. Or ones basic will just isn’t up for it, right now. Or conditions changed and the resolution doesn’t fit any more.

What ever the original reasoning, resolutions are of the times they were made. Forgetting the past and walking on into the cloud of unknowing must surely be our constant guide.

A good New Year to you all
My late mothers birthday today
My late teachers birthday today.

Thank you
Jade reader
for sticking with it.

The year has turned
Last year has gone
the memories
will
fade….