Category Archives: Teachings

In Response to Ryokan – Buddha is Here

Reflections
Reflections

Having seen oneself
Utterly lost in the world
Bow down
With ease
Look up

In gratitude and grief
There are waves of light flashing through the trees
In gratitude and grief
Buddha is here.

Another poem which will be read at the cremation ceremony.

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That’s Suffering

You know, the trouble is I know there is nothing I can do to make myself feel or be better. He replied, That’s Dukkha! And I had to smile. It is so true. Yes, sometimes a little bit of this or a little bit of that will help alleviate suffering but in the ultimate sense there is nothing that can be done to get rid of it. And knowing that to be true can help with accepting and being with pain. Battling pain IS suffering. Being with pain is…..just pain.

I have a stinker of a cold at the moment. The worst one for years and years. Running nose, sneezing constantly and explosively, headache, exhausted. And to top that I’m jointly responsible for running a retreat. The theme is The Four Seals of Dharma, one of those seals is Dukkha. Nothing like the Dharma showing up, true in the moment.

But do not worry. It will pass. The sneezing will end the dripping nose will stop, the wind will abate (blizzard conditions here at Throssel) and fairly soon the sun will be out again. In the mean time…I’ll endeavour to walk and sit with few complaints. That only makes matters worse!

The most recent post on Field of Merit, Moving and Changing by Rev. Alicia could not come at a better time. Could it be that the process of having and living with a cold or a more serious health issue be about creativity? In a certain way I think it is…oh but wait a moment, here comes another sneeze. I can leave my thoughts on that for another time.

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Travelling – A Severer, more Girt-up Way.

Gleaming boots, bright morning.
Gleaming boots, bright morning.

So proud am I. My boots have not looked so good in years. Cleaned and polished ready to take me along the towpath beside the Thames in Reading, Berkshire. From north to south the whole feel of the country changes. The buzz and bustle of humanity is notched up considerably down here in the south and so close to London. North Eastern Cumbria is a backwater by comparison. The major buzz up there is sheep getting ready to lamb. Barrrr! Transplanting oneself, traveling, involves *girt*ing up to leave the known and step into that vulnerable place of being-on-the-road.

And it isn’t just traveling that has one vulnerable and in need of finding refuge from the buzz and bustle of life. Where do you go to for safety and comfort? On a radio program last Saturday one of the precentors posed that question. As a child he would climb into his built-in wardrobe. Really! And then listeners phoned in with their revelations. One grown woman said she climbs under her office desk so she can’t be seen or found. Others take refuge in wardrobes, airing cupboards, under a bed etc. One could think this is a sign of mental/emotional instability however I am thinking maybe such behaviour is not so strange. Small confined spaces are where we can feel physically secure providing the opportunity to let the buzz, settle. A space which facilitates the call to turn within oneself and reflect on big questions, without distraction.

Yesterday, emerging from the car at the priory here in Reading I realized how the confined space of the car insulates and holds secure and safe. Relatively safe I have to say considering how physically vulnerable one actually is in a vehicle traveling in fast-moving traffic! So there is an illusory element to that safety pod on wheels, as also with that cupboard or favorite hidy-hole of childhood. We know the temporary/ethereal nature of these secret spaces and perhaps that is what draws us back.

Our girt-up way of living, our on-the-road severer and constantly active way, is balanced by answering the often subtle call to return within ourselves. The mediation cushion or bench, or chair is the answer to that call. Or it might a hidy-hole…

*Girt up*; prepared or equipped, as for a journey or for work, an allusion to the ancient custom of gathering the long flowing garments into the girdle and tightening it before any exertion; hence, adjectively, eagerly or constantly active; strenuous; striving. “A severer, more girt-up way of living.” J. C. Shairp.

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Accumulation and Cleaning

Clean fridge - Ah! that's better.
Ah! that’s better.

Each time I enter the local corner shop I breath in a now familiar smell. In the back of my mind I wonder what it is and where does it come from. Now I know! This morning opening the fridge where I’m house sitting the same smell wafted out. Fridge mold can insinuate itself slowly until I guess it gets to critical mass. Neither afraid or ashamed I had at it and cleaned the fridge thoroughly. Too bad I didn’t consult the internet before doing so as using the right cleaning agents insure the mold never returns. Here’s one persons step by step guide to fridge cleaning and mold elimination.

Mold and dirt and dust accumulate over time, as does the accumulation of clothes, books, shoes, tools, fixings, paperwork – the list goes on and on. These past weeks I’ve been helping somebody to resolve things, that’s to recycle and move on the accumulation of a life time. My pleasure. Each time a substantial amount leaves the house somehow breathing becomes easier.

As I carefully and enthusiastically tackled the fridge I was mentally moving towards what else needed cleaning. What could I clean next? Indeed some people can spend a good part of their day cleaning and tidying, whether it’s needed or not! One persons OK for the moment is another persons life work. We are all built differently, have unique mental/emotional capacities and the standards we attempt to uphold can be self evidently RIGHT.

Anybody who has been on a retreat in our tradition will know the first scheduled activity after meditation and scripture singing is….cleaning! It’s not as if the place is dirty it’s just that grunge and cobwebs and the like accumulate imperceptibility over time and need to be kept up with. It took me awhile to realize the everyday life teaching embedded within these early morning, cold and hungry, work periods. And the appreciation deepens and is still deepening.

From the Heart Sutra: No accumulation, no annihilation. – And still we live our days attentively noticing and dealing with that which comes to us. Ultimately there isn’t a measuring stick one can apply to our efforts, or to the efforts of others. One thing is for sure though, condemnation of oneself, and of others, is an accumulation that’s best kept up with.

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Merton – ALL in ALL

A quote from Thomas Merton. Left by Walter in the comments section and placed here for contemplation.

One thing has suddenly hit me – that nothing counts except love and that a solitude that is not simply the wide-openness of love and freedom is nothing. Love and solitude are the one ground of true maturity and freedom. Solitude that is just solitude and nothing else (i.e. excludes everything else but solitude) is worthless. True solitude embraces everything, for it is the fullness of love that rejects nothing and no-one, is open to All in All.
From the journals of Thomas Merton on Easter Thursday, April 14th 1966,

(The Journals of Thomas Merton, Volume Six 1966-1967, Harper Collins).

In the next paragraph Merton writes, After several days of rain the sky is clearing. Afternoons at the hermitge become once again possible. I walked a bit in the woods….

There is space enough on a chair, a bench or cushion for one solitary person. In generosity. And then we get up and walk out into the sunshine, or rain.

Thank you Walter, bows to you for typing out the quote and offering it here.

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