Never too Late to Learn – Video

For those who know me personally, you may notice I’m looking and sounding weary and the truth of the matter is, I am! In order to upload this, I had to drop a bin full of vanity’.

And for anybody who, like me, was always being told you are shy when a child there is something here for you. I didn’t go into the matter at any length because of the need to keep the video down to under 3 mins. Recently I’ve come to see that shyness in childhood is most likely a sign of ‘sensitivity’. A sensitivity that goes unnoticed and unaddressed. Having a different perspective is helpful and there is reading do be done to understand oneself better in this area of life. Of course in terms of Buddhism, we attempt to drop labels, of being this way or that way, but labels stick. Meditation and daily life training dissolve the glue.

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15 thoughts on “Never too Late to Learn – Video”

  1. There is wonderful book that takes a closer look at what western culture disdainfully refers to as “shyness.” Is it called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking. The author is Susan Cain. I highly recommend it.

    1. Thanks Kathy, I may have looked into that book but I’ll check it out again. I do so wonder about the labels though. They are a way into investigation with a view to unstick the labels. I know you know that and so good to know you are around watching.

      1. My favorite thing about the book was that is does away with labels. Like everything else these tendencies among beings fall along a bell curve. One might even say that they preserve diversity and are essential to the survival of species.

        Also, I have never thought of you as shy. “Bold and adventurous” are more fitting terms… though, of course, we don’t want to apply labels!

  2. WOW! That was brave. xxxxx I miss you you know, in a very sisterly way, but I do. Any chance of a chat sometime, just to touch base and to share ‘stuff’?
    In gassho, Stephanie

    1. Of course we can do that Stephanie. How about tomorrow, Friday. For those of you reading this you should know Stephanie and I check-in quite frequently.

  3. Thanks Rev Mugo. Perhaps readers may be interested to know that psychologists have a term ‘highly sensitive personality’ for what you talk about! I don’t like labels but identify with this to some extent. And I also wonder if there is the opposite; there seem to be some people who could be said to be ‘highly insensitive’ (or is that just me being judgemental!).

    1. It is you noting what you find and the training aspect is what you do with that thought. Meaning if you then start to label etc. etc. that is being judgemental. However one can’t deny the evidence of ones senses and it would be unwise to do so. At some point(s) the mind that is in the habit of labeling of both self and others dims down and goes into the background. Given half a chance. That’s my answer for you. And also wondering if you would like to send me an email as I’ve been thinking of you of late.

  4. Thank you, Mugo, for this helpful and thoughtful video. I am one of the two people you referred to, and the one who mentioned he was shy (still, at the age of 62!). The word “shy” when applied to another seems full of judgement and leaves a burden of shame. Your video offers encouragement to let go of the burden and walk a little bit more upright.

    1. Hi there Steve, glad you caught the video and thanks for inspiring me to make it. It has been some years since I did that. Yes, I always carried the thought that I had a problem for being shy. It did stop me from going to big gatherings like conferences before becoming a monk and to a certain extent I avoid such gatherings now. If I am asked to attend which isn’t that often.

  5. Dear Rev Mugo, I have been following your blog for a while and just wanted to say I find it very inspiring. I also loved your video on shyness, which I related to. Looking forward to your next post, Storm.

    1. Well thank you Storm for leaving this message. I’ll have to see what I come up with next. I’ve a bunch of ideas no following all of these comments. However, I’ll be traveling from Saturday for a week visiting people so I’ll have to fit in writing between activities.

  6. Just like all the others who have been touched by your video about shyness, it also resonated with me. I think there are a lot of people who privately think of themselves as shy but outwardly always seem to be leading, putting themselves out there , volunteering and managing situations and people.
    I’ve always struggled with shyness/sensitivities but for me what worked was putting on a uniform. Many years as a nurse and quite a few as a Lay Minister, both of these put me in a position where I was visible, but wearing the uniform somehow gave me the confidence to do whatever was necessary. This too has its dangers , which can and has been misused in history but for me it became an enabling form.
    Retirement from nursing and the Lay Ministry forced me to look at how I handled situations without the outward trappings of those roles. Interestingly I then found that age helped me, I no longer had to prove anything to anyone, and it seemed that with that knowledge I could just be myself and let people like me or not!
    Thank you for doing the video, look how many people it has engaged. In Gassho Adrienne

    1. You have a point there Adrienne, and I do think that age is a factor. I was just out walking on the bottom road. Not a car/lorry/ tractor in sight, as per usual. Safe for young children to run and play and there were two doing that this lunch time, with their mother. I had a bit of a run with them, a go at walking backwards and generally chattering. The five year old smiled up and volunteered, ‘you’re nice’! How wonderful and freeing for a child to be able to say that so openly to a complete stranger. I guess I’m now a grandmother figure and not appearing as a threat! The uniform, my robes were not signaling anything to me, or to them probably. Just a long dress, I guess.
      Thanks as always for being around and especially leaving a comment.

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